Hand signs, hand jobs, hands up!

So, can anyone please tell me what happened to the “high-five”? Have you noticed? Proof, just like that - it’s gone? Oh you may see people doing it, offering it to you then you're forced to do it back or look like a la-hoo-zer. Did you know that in some South American countries use of the celebratory high-five is unheard of? I once had to teach a boss how to high-five in order to fit in with our Gringo colleagues - it was so painfully funny, talk about teaching the short bus kids plus she really never got the “oomph” behind the whole gesture. Guess which hand sign I showed her (mentally) a lot 

But really take a look around the high-five has been replaced with the fist bump, news flash, anyone?

Where did this trend come from? I just getting used to the double “C” heart sign that thankfully pushed the slanted peace sign out of the every photo taken everywhere, by everyone and shown everywhere, ugh. You think I exaggerate?

What happened to the days when the hand signs were so simple and minimal: you either had the wave or the finger; take your pick anything beyond that was usually spoken… we spoke to one another and from the heart even! Wow! What a concept.

The power of speech, the power of our words, the intentions behind them and the vibrational power of primordial sounds we chant, listen to, repeat and we heal.

Say what you mean and mean what you say

Seriously, does this even have to be stated? Times are now, do you see it? Understand: what we do today makes for better tomorrows, duh? You just got fired? And you feel down on yourself, worried and insecure? It’s understandable but so are moving on quickly in order to see the opportunities that ARE there waiting to be found. It’s only a matter of letting go and looking with eyes of love.

I good friend recently reminded me of the Louise Hays classic book,  “You can Heal Your Life” and an exercise where you look in the mirror and place our hand over our throat area and say a healing affirmation. Why this area?

The throat represents our will and ability to communicate.

The throat is a weak link that can sabotage us from our paths.

The throat is the channel between our head and out hearts

Knowing that honesty and direct speech patterns are my ways of verbally communicating and knowing how much energy is carried in those words plus how those are received is so important to pay attention to.

“I’m from New Yawk I don’t got time to bull shit, I tell it like it is and how I see it at least you’ll know where I clearly stand, you okay wit dat?” - me

I recently found myself on the phone in a difficult conversation as I knew this call was coming I had prepared myself mentally and emotionally to not receive the negativity that may come my way and instead send love. When the phone rang, I answered with a smile, as the 2 hour chat went on and on and on I decided that each time I would speak I would do so in a slower pace, a softer tone of voice and be quick and to the point. Wow, I can say the change in attitude from fight to uh-oh and dishevelment on the other end was immediate and very obvious. Carefully chosen words spoken from the intention of love causing obvious and total dishevelment from the other party and I silently screamed victory! And secretly pictured just one hand sign in my mind. What? I’m not perfect!

Can’t we all just be real? Step away from your smart phones and look into your own eyes, look into the eyes of those around you… bring back communication to its most basic level I swear I never really understood the power of a simple smile could be so endlessly healing especially when given to a stranger.

Are we are too closed off in our own cellular world to even look up and let go of a smile? I know plenty of people who have no trouble letting go of a fart those are the first ones to look up and grab some clean air before the sink rises.

So, what’s up with not smiling? And this -à : ) don’t count! Geez!

I AM a record producer

I met a special man

With so much music from his hands

Couldn’t believe it was true

There has to be another you

Mystic magic everywhere n nobody’s phased

Cuz all that matters is

if YOU can see the rays?

They’re comin’ from you…

Oh M.r-Sun won’t you please

Shine your light on me!

Allow me to set your music free
So we can all be happy
and share in that power 
so all will find our own true me's


"To believe your own thought, to believe that what is true for you in your private heart is true for all men - that is genius." - Ralph Waldo Emerson


Ladies and gentlemen, it is my pleasure to introduce to you my friend and musical genius of, M.r-Sun

Just like that I’m in….Thanks LeBron!

Many years ago when I was a married, stay at home mom, my life revolved around my husband’s career. Trips, babies and holidays where all planned around his ever encompassing life as a basketball coach, it was by choice there were no complaints, well sort of, but my life was exciting…. by fan standards.

The Coach: extremely driven, well known and respected, recognized and very successful. We traveled a lot with the team(s) because b-ball is a year round sport- bet you didn’t know that. I called it the world tour of high school gyms across Florida but when you have winning teams year after year the “tourneys”, b-ball jargon for tournament, invites pour in and you get travel and play all over the country, fun right? Not so much though when your family grows and you add 3 little kids to the roster. Let me tell you any pregnancy lived out on wooden bleachers ain’t so much fun on the tush and with a belly out to here….thank God for the team manager who knew to keep a supply of Moon Pies for the coach‘s wife’s midnight cravings.

You would think after so many years of being around the court that I would know a little bit about the game but I don’t or rather I do, a lot, but through osmosis. I was the “creative one” in the family and try as I might to move the subject beyond the ball, court, players: high school, college, NBA, even overseas teams, drafts, trades, etc. were tough to compete against. My husband’s “mistress” was everywhere: on TV, in the sports section of the newspaper, in the games on TV, in the highlights clips of the games he had just finished watching on the sports segment of the news, on the 6 AND 11 o’clock broadcast, in the stack games on VHS tapes to review or for scouting other teams, well, you can get the picture.

So was it a surprise to anyone that when the marriage ended so would my association with the sport? Ha! If only I could be so lucky, 2 of the 3 offspring turned out to be tiny carbon copies of their dad. Now try sitting through your kid’s endless series of seasons and enjoy it with a smile. Sounds selfish, right? It was, I tried, I was there but only to watch my kids play and get the chance to cheer for them (I’m LOUD and obnoxious poor kids lol).

Hats off to my son who played for his dad in high school tough spot ‘cause when all the other kids got to go home and complain about the coach mine had to suck it up, live with him and deal and after a loss just imagine that car ride home. Although one of my favorite things to say to my son then was, “want me to go yell at your coach?” it was our joke because this family although somewhat divided stayed together and the Coach and I were mature enough to still be parents and share time as a family together.

Some advice to all divorced parents: make EVERY effort to TRY work together; your kid’s sanity is really what is most important.

So fast-forward to now, 2 college basketball scholarships for a couple of not so tall but really good players- it was all worth it.

And me? I’m grateful. Although I must confess for several months after the initial break up I would have to put the TV on ESPN to fall asleep (hhhmmm) but I cherish the memories of having drinks with Jim Valvano,
 

dinners with Leonard Hamilton, and answering the phone to have Dick Vitale, Billy Donovan or Rick Patino on the other end, watching and drooling over Pat Riley, sitting second row at the Arena behind Mickey Arison at a Heat game, or having something to talk about with Tim Hardaway while we both were getting P.T., and for all the NBA players and college coaches I watch and read about today that I know and can say "I knew them when…." I believe it was those years around the game which gave me the confidence and the “game face” to have my very first interview ever, be a one on one exclusive with his Highness Michael Jordan. (Yes, I have the autographed ball plus photo to prove it)

And now thanks to LBJ there’s new sticker on my car bumper and much to the relief of my kids, I admit… I AM a basketball fan.

Let’s go HEAT!

Anger, Forgiveness and Patience

In the last week a tremendous about of anger, insults, libel, slander and defamation of character has invaded my life. Not to say that I’m used to it but when you’re from New York generally you say what you mean and mean what you say and defend yourself with facts when being attacked and in general most people have a difficult time dealing with that and THE TRUTH.

Perhaps because part of my mission is to uncover injustices, the fake, the faults, basically the B.S., I have learned to also not absorb the negativity that arises at those moments. I once was also an angry person with a short trigger so many things would and could set me off - I believed I might have been born that way perhaps bringing with me a bad temper from another lifetime. So I’ve worked on myself so that in THIS lifetime I wouldn’t feel so angry, so quick to judge, so quick to react, to not be such a New Yawker outside of the 5 boroughs. But the happenings of this last week got me thinking, researching and trying to understand what brought out so much anger from one tiny misunderstanding over a "thing"?

"When reason ends, then anger begins. 
Therefore, anger is a sign of weakness." – His Holiness the Dalai Lama

I grew up thinking my father was such an angry person but when I understood all the injustices, struggles, poverty he grew up with I could see him in another light. Perhaps if there was a way we could see into another person’s sad lifetime we could understand the anger and venom they spit and try to look at them with forgiveness and have patience with them and NOT REACT “for they know not the harm they cause to themselves and others by spewing their own anger”

"If subconscious anger had a parallel in Buddhist writings, it would have to do with what is called mental unhappiness or dissatisfaction. This is regarded as the source of anger and hostility. We can see subconscious anger in terms of a lack of awareness, as well as an active misconstruing of reality."
 -His Holiness the Dalai Lama

I’m not a Buddhist but I have study many different concepts in my search for wisdom and guidance so it comes from all sorts of sources. Many years ago the mailroom guy where I used to work was laughing at my frustration and impatience over something silly but of so much importance at the moment. His laughter of course bothered me until he said, “Girl, you need to go to the supermarket and learn to choose the longest line to wait in.” Classic advice.

I think anger comes from hate; hate is the opposite of love and not the team I choose to play on. I may get angry at times, I’m human, but my anger comes like a comet- hot, fast moving and gone. Not am I a grudge-holder, troublemaker, instigator or hateful person, I smile at strangers and look to help out where I can, in fact there is an imbalance of how much I give to others that is greater than what I give to myself and I’m working on that as well. Just don’t f*ck with me unjustly cause then you too will suffer the wrath that I can spew.

Where there is anger there is a need for forgiveness and patience with that person or situation, many times it may have nothing to do with us personally but the ripple effects can touch so many others it’s just so sad and something that we must forgive. As a good friend said to me this week, “the sooner you forgive, the sooner the healing will begin.” And I have forgiven, said prayers for and wished those persons well. And have applied the “lose early theory” better to lose the few thousand dollars spent already than the couple of more thousand dollars I would have continued to spend in the wrong establishment and in this economy! Pshhh!

Forgiveness is a sign of positive self-esteem.

Forgiveness is realizing that the energy that we spend hanging on to past issues is better spent on improving our present and our future. It is in letting go of the past, that we can move on and live in the present, the NOW.

How do you handle anger? With patience. A person with great patience is someone who is respected, just by their nature, they are trusted, they demonstrate dignity, are loved by others and don’t bring problems with them. Thanks Christopher for being an exemplary example of a peaceful, loving and forgiving person – we should hang out some more, lol.

"Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned." 
The Buddha

Illusions

There’s a woman at my job who’s office is the most peaceful, Zen like place you would ever imagine to find in a building that makes any US Post Office look like The Delano Hotel. Naturally, I was attracted to enter and compliment on her dimly lit, Dalai Lama poster hanging, bamboo growing, space thinking she was also a calm, compassionate and chill person. That was when I first started working there, turns out the office decor is only an illusion. I guess this is the way this woman would like to be, on the inside, because sadly, she is one of the least peaceful people I have ever worked with.

“We're born alone, we live alone, we die alone. Only through our love and friendship can we create the illusion for the moment that we're not alone.” - Orson Welles

Blame it on the solar eclipse or what but the curtains are being drawn and the veil lifted thus the illusions are being exposed. I believe we all try to put forth our best, do our best and be our best, especially when we are around other people. Sadly, as well, we’re not always that way with those who we love they get stuck dealing with the less peaceful parts of us- the illusion of that all loving person you went to bed with might wake up looking and acting like Medusa in the morning. We all have our good and bad days but what does it mean when people create illusions that are so far from who they really are as humans? 

I recently made an art purchase I was very excited about because I had seen and loved the piece months before but was unable to afford to buy it and when I saw it again recently as part of an “art show” the only words out of my mouth to the artist were, “that’s mine.” I was so excited and proud of myself for now being able to make the purchase. Unfortunately, for me the transaction came with some conditions that neither the artist nor I were aware of and when I took the piece home after several weeks of being on display, as per the artist instructions, the owner of the venue where I found the artist and piece again i.e. NOT AN ART GALLERY became very upset when I refused to bring it back for the remaining 5 days of the “art show.” And thus I was banned, ex-communicated, asked not to return ever by the owner in not such a nice manner.  I refuse to go where I’m not welcomed but the saddest part of all of that mess was that I had been visiting that venue almost daily for several months and have even blogged about how special and magical the location was. Can you say retraction?

WRONG-O! Another illusion dispersed right before my eyes. How is it possible for these seemingly normal people to put forth and build around them facades which evoke peace and love when in reality there is only anger, resentment, envy, jealousy and hate inside of them which they freely share with those around them? I feel so sorry for the woman at work because she might get a “good morning” with a smile but its all the nasty things being said about her behind her back which make me feel bad for her. I also feel sorry for the owner of the establishment I used to frequent. The good vibes and people which started the business off and kept regulars spending serious money and coming back night after night, like myself, have all but been lost because of the ill manners the owner demonstrates again and again. I really shouldn’t be surprised at how I was spoken to - I’ve seen how poorly he treats his lovely girlfriend but when you treat paying customers so poorly unless your business is a front for some illegal doings you’re not going to stay in business for long and it doesn’t take a business degree from Harvard to figure that one out. 

There is no god higher than truth.  ~Mahatma Gandhi

Kelly says: “SAY LOVE AS OFTEN AS YOU CAN, EVERYDAY”

I’m not a Twitter-er, Tweeter, Twit, ….. whatever, but the one time I check the site out was to see my friend’s Twitter account. She’s special in many ways and just to clarify I didn’t mean “special” al la short bus “special” i.e. mentally challenged. She is so talented and caring and loving it’s amazing. For many, many years I referred to her as my Love Guru I would run to her for advice all the time and what great advice she gives! She is equally generous as creative as is a perfectionist. I cherished our meeting even from before I found out to be known to be friends with her is to hear, “Oh, you’re Kelly’s friends, hhmmmm, she’s is a very special person, that’s good to know you and her are friends.”

Do it! Say it - as often as you can - to yourself, in your head, as you drive, to your co-workers, to strangers and those you truly love….

Just say: LOVE

Is it simple enough for ya? That Tweet was several months ago catching up with the lovely Dr. Kelly she explained how she has taken on LOVE as a serious mission not only for political reason as she explained but also for human reasons. Say love to each and every person you come across see if things change for you. Just having a loving thought towards someone in your line of sight moves you to be on a much higher frequency because by sending it out you will also receive it, the >it< is, LOVE.

It takes some working on especially if that word is not frequently used in your speech pattern. It wasn’t until I was 34 years old, in the mist of huge, heated argument with my Dad that I found the courage to tell him:

“You’ve never, ever said, “I love you”

“But I’ve shown you, no?”

“Yes, but you’ve never said it also needs to be said”

“Okay! Then, I love you!”

“Okay, I love you too”

And like that the word staring to flow into my speech pattern and by flow I mean I was able to say it without getting choked up. Fast forward to now and I say it to everyone so easily and frequently and almost as inappropriately as Nicole Richie used to call guys “hey, gorgeous” on that show. And to watch other people’s reactions is amazing; a study in the human being’s psyche.

“Let’s hug it out, man!”

The MAGIC happens when you see it, call it or accept it?

Magic is happening people,  get with it, wake up!

Why does it feel as if I’m screaming at the top of my lungs and there’s no sound coming out of my mouth? I’m there, in the middle, of that moment, the one moment of purest tension in the black and white movie of our lives....

EXT. BUSY CITY STREET                                                                       

Background freeze, 360 pan shot of  young (wink) upset LADY camera ends in EXTREME CU The darkness of her throat.

I would like to be heard, I want people to listen but where is it that I am supposed to take platform? What am I supposed to say? How do I know to even ask these questions? I don’t know... I'm just following my gut because lately it has shown me magic. Can we get a lil Lil Kim up in here, now?

“Shorty don't believe me, then come with me tonight

And I'll show you magic

(What? What?) Magic (uh huh uh huh)

I got the magic stick”

On some level it feels as if my secret "Bucket List" is being checked off wish by wish. But I've never made that sort of list, never even thought of what would go on a list like that. I have real thoughts to think of not random acts of desparation to hold on to life of a list of if's you knew you were gonna die. (um, hello? we are all going to die its those who know how to live who die well) And yet my wildest dreams are coming true in some form or another, all on their own lately.....when I've followed my gut like magic, I hold the power and its inside. There is magic to be made and seen and all you have to know is where to look and you’ll see it as well, I promise (What? What?) Maybe this will be helpful a cliff notes version to:

“How to See Magic”

In order to see the magic in your life, one must remember to always 

Look…

 with the eyes of a child

 with your Heart

 with Compassion

 with Hope

 with Faith

 with Gratitude

 with Forgiveness

at and in every situation and moment life brings us, especially the tough ones!

I know of another magic place the Oracle Bar- that place is really magically inclined mainly because of the many people who hang out there are of a higher vibration which naturally penetrates your aura and helps pulls you up and allows you to let go so that energies can move, flow and the magic can happen...

Say: “BULA, Love to the heavens and earth”

“Believe me, you can’t afford me”

Cute and cuddly as it is, happy as a 13-year old jumping around because her crush gave her a teddy bear as I was to accept this surprise gift….don’t think I can be bought so easily. I just want to clarify that. So, why make such a big deal about a teddy bear? Because most guys don’t need to make any effort anymore.  : -|

Fossil check time or not, the fact of the matter remains “relationships” have become as cheap and easy to get as a cell phone. The speed and overall manner in which general relationships i.e. friends, lovers,… develop now a days can be correlated with the ever improving technological world we live in today, and more directly with cell phones. Some kind of theory huh? But hear me out.

Remember when you had the brick and cell phone minutes were so expensive? We didn't talk much via the cell then. Remember when you had to invest time in someone in order to get to know him or her, to see if you liked each other and you had to physically be together to do that? Think about when we had to remember someone’s phone number and waiting to go through all the digits on a rotary phone – ha! and if you were nervous and misdialed? Sigh, oh the effort just to ask, “Hello, is so-and-so home?”  :- 0

Think about the all the number of ways we can connect with someone today how quickly and instantaneously we can click, to see if we “click.” Communication at the speed of light, relationships created simply by accepting a friend request on FaceBook, emails, IM’s, text and sext messages, web cam, Skype, IPhone -we are right there reaching out to another human being in the least of human ways, and then we wonder why the relationship didn’t work out. As an early adapter I’m all for technology but when it comes to relationships I’ve (had) to learned TIME is my friend. :- /

Sadly, one over-nighted stuffed animal is a HUGE effort these days. Yo! when was the last time you've seen a guy make a move to show his appreciation for a woman he likes or has  been with? And buying drinks doesn't count!

You all know what I’m talking about boys, I’m not male bashing here at all, I love men, but I’m am sure even the nicest of the nicest of guys has been an asshole given the opportunity and its not all your fault because we women allow it. And if we don't we're considered a biatch. X- (

Why have we allowed ourselves to be courted by emoticons, LOL and smiley faces? Who knew a single parenthesis could make or break your day? It’s time to reach out with your HEART and TOUCH someone. The power of touch is just so important, the the exchange of energy shared at that moment, magical. Ask any lonely elderly person when was the last time they felt a warm hand on theirs and what it made them feel like. As a Reiki Master I know the importance of touch and the power it has to heal. One day walking through the Haight-Ashbury District in San Francisco a really smelly homeless man approached me and ask, “Can you spare a hug?” *-*

Thanks Diana for reminding us to…

Reach out and touch

Somebody’s hand

Make this world a better place

If you can


p.s. on the evening after writing this posting my beloved IPhone was misplaced, thank you to the universe for the sign and believe it or not I'm really LMAO about this whole story now!
peace.