Many years ago when I was a married, stay at home mom, my life revolved around my husband’s career. Trips, babies and holidays where all planned around his ever encompassing life as a basketball coach, it was by choice there were no complaints, well sort of, but my life was exciting…. by fan standards.
The Coach: extremely driven, well known and respected, recognized and very successful. We traveled a lot with the team(s) because b-ball is a year round sport- bet you didn’t know that. I called it the world tour of high school gyms across Florida but when you have winning teams year after year the “tourneys”, b-ball jargon for tournament, invites pour in and you get travel and play all over the country, fun right? Not so much though when your family grows and you add 3 little kids to the roster. Let me tell you any pregnancy lived out on wooden bleachers ain’t so much fun on the tush and with a belly out to here….thank God for the team manager who knew to keep a supply of Moon Pies for the coach‘s wife’s midnight cravings.
You would think after so many years of being around the court that I would know a little bit about the game but I don’t or rather I do, a lot, but through osmosis. I was the “creative one” in the family and try as I might to move the subject beyond the ball, court, players: high school, college, NBA, even overseas teams, drafts, trades, etc. were tough to compete against. My husband’s “mistress” was everywhere: on TV, in the sports section of the newspaper, in the games on TV, in the highlights clips of the games he had just finished watching on the sports segment of the news, on the 6 AND 11 o’clock broadcast, in the stack games on VHS tapes to review or for scouting other teams, well, you can get the picture.
So was it a surprise to anyone that when the marriage ended so would my association with the sport? Ha! If only I could be so lucky, 2 of the 3 offspring turned out to be tiny carbon copies of their dad. Now try sitting through your kid’s endless series of seasons and enjoy it with a smile. Sounds selfish, right? It was, I tried, I was there but only to watch my kids play and get the chance to cheer for them (I’m LOUD and obnoxious poor kids lol).
Hats off to my son who played for his dad in high school tough spot ‘cause when all the other kids got to go home and complain about the coach mine had to suck it up, live with him and deal and after a loss just imagine that car ride home. Although one of my favorite things to say to my son then was, “want me to go yell at your coach?” it was our joke because this family although somewhat divided stayed together and the Coach and I were mature enough to still be parents and share time as a family together.
Some advice to all divorced parents: make EVERY effort to TRY work together; your kid’s sanity is really what is most important.
So fast-forward to now, 2 college basketball scholarships for a couple of not so tall but really good players- it was all worth it.
And me? I’m grateful. Although I must confess for several months after the initial break up I would have to put the TV on ESPN to fall asleep (hhhmmm) but I cherish the memories of having drinks with Jim Valvano,
dinners with Leonard Hamilton, and answering the phone to have Dick Vitale, Billy Donovan or Rick Patino on the other end, watching and drooling over Pat Riley, sitting second row at the Arena behind Mickey Arison at a Heat game, or having something to talk about with Tim Hardaway while we both were getting P.T., and for all the NBA players and college coaches I watch and read about today that I know and can say "I knew them when…." I believe it was those years around the game which gave me the confidence and the “game face” to have my very first interview ever, be a one on one exclusive with his Highness Michael Jordan. (Yes, I have the autographed ball plus photo to prove it)
And now thanks to LBJ there’s new sticker on my car bumper and much to the relief of my kids, I admit… I AM a basketball fan.
Let’s go HEAT!
